Letter to Roberta on being bipolar

 I can look back and judge my actions, thoughts and intentions. Moving back and forth from one state of mind to another was precarious at first because I didn’t know weather I was remembering or experiencing. Most of the time it’s just a hassle, when not trying to forge some forsaken purpose. It’s hard to tell when engaged full blown~ You said I need the medication. Well, I blow off everything as a joke when I can’t fully accept it. You’re right I need the meds and can tell if the prescriber's meds manufacturer have been changed to supposedly save me money. You are a very strong person, or someone capable of fighting the good fight without chemical alteration. I personally find it easier to live with some tweaking of the psyche with a little help from my friends. It does take an awful long time with many pitfalls that lead to near tragedies in order to know what works.

Roberta is a cousin who is about my age.  She is intelligent, hard working and agnostic.  Many of these characteristics I have since abandoned.  Ok they sneak up on me when I'm not paying attention.